As we head into the run up to the upcoming election I feel it is my duty to draw your attention to the lack of fun we are currently forced to ensure by the Adern regime.
In their efforts to keep the nation’s essential workers, health compromised people, grandparents safe from Covid-19, they have completely taken the sense of fun our society used to have when Bill English was our master (The English years were well known for their flamboyance and general sense of mischief. That certainly isn’t the situation now).
Today I was at the mall and imagine my outrage to find this recreational vehicle wrapped in some kind of bizarre opaque cling-film. A small child ran towards it and subsequently burst into tears when she realised her pushchair was the only only way out of her plastic nightmare. I admit I had a tear in my eye as she was bundled off by her mildly aggrieved parents.
Then, sir, my rage grew to apoplectic levels when I found this fenced off helicopter. This time no children were sobbing at the ramparts but it was early on in the day. I’m certain if I was to return later in the day I would find hundreds of young children tearfully screaming for a place to be themselves.
Now I have to wear a mask when I’m going on the bus. When am I, a well-off middle aged white man, going to catch a break?
Why can’t I just he allowed to do what I want, when I want?
And the kids.