After travelling internationally, there is a tendency for the head to lose the ability to keep itself aloft. I sit here in Narita Airport in Tokyo willing the nogginy weight atop my neck to maintain its usual positioning, yet all it appears to want to do is chin-buttered my man-Boobs.
All is not lost. Some ¥en wisely spent on a large “basic coffee” has the desired effect of keeping me awake long enough to enjoy the free food and beverage British Airways has to offer.
The length of the distance between New Zealand and the Europe so many of us share familial links with is renowned. The first flight takes half a day. Sure you may have time for a quick nap nestled in your moob, but the reality of the journey means in fairly short order you are devouring another half-day flight before you are even close to your destination.
Twenty four hours flying time plays many havocs on mind and soul.
But what joy the travel can bring. I awoke from a longer nap on our Auckland to Tokyo flight to just the thinnest hint of a sunrise climbing the distant horizon. Slowly the colours morphed through dark orange, blues and purples until the final explosion of dawn blinded me with a subsequent screen glare that prevented any conclusion to the Great British Bake Off.
Seeing Fuji loom as the mountainous guardian of the sprawling ubanity of Tokyo was particularly zen. This zen was inversely proportional to the level of chaos and rage that greeted me on landing at Heathrow. Fog had combined with the English inability to organise itself during a crisis to create some exceedingly unhappy travellers. Thanks to a quirk in the system I am yet to identify, our plane was allowed to leave meaning we eventually arrived at our Aberdeen destination over two hours late. Better to be there at 1am than on a couch in Heathrow Terminal 5 cursing the airport gods for the most useless excuse for an airport since [insert useless airport here – cannot currently think of one more useless than Heathrow due to my jetlag (which is far worse thanks to Heathrow)].
So we are now here in Scotland enjoying the pre-Christmas banter. We won’t be returning to New Zealand until late-January. Whether there are more posts between now and then really does depend on my ability/motivation to write them. John Key now gathers dust with Robert Muldoon and the great Jenny Shipley in the Great Big Book of Former National PMs. Our parliament has decided, in their infinite wisdom, to recess until summer is almost over.
I assume the country will continue to run in their (and my) absence. Who knows whether anything worthy of satirical cut downs will occur in this time? Maybe we will never know. In any case, requests can be sent through the @boonman account linked to this blog.
Until 2017, or the next blog post, MyThinks wishes all its readers a very merry non-denominational holiday season.