Key vows not to apologise

Pressure is mounting on Prime Minister John Key to apologise for misleading New Zealanders last year over claims a number of jihadi brides had left the country to join ISIS.

At the time the Prime Minister said hundreds of kiwi women had left the country.

“I’ve seen reports that several dozen kiwi girls have headed to the Middle East. We need to be mindful that these 17 girls pose a national security risk and we must carefully monitor both of them.”

This week it has been revealed that no New Zealand citizens or residents had done this and, in fact, the person Key was perhaps thinking about had left from Australia.

During an interview with chief National Party media strategist Mike Hosking, Key said he wouldn’t be apologising.

“No Mike,” Key told the fawning broadcaster, “I won’t be apologising. In my time as PM, I’ve told literally millions of lies. I can’t be expected to apologise for every single lie I tell. If I did that I’d  be apologising most of the time and lying hardly at all. That’s just ridiculous.”

Hosking welcomed this news before loud face-sucking sounds were heard during the lead in to the news-break.

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