A Message from Hekia

Hey y’all.

Hekia here (Parata – Education Minister).

I just thought I’d drop you all a quick note about a few changes I’ve recently made to the education system.

Firstly, let’s talk about at-risk kids. Awesome! Some of these guys are trying really hard. I love turning up to a school in South Auckland or on the East Cape and watching them learn from behind my phalanx of body-guards.

It’s important that we really spend a lot of money on at-risk kids. I’ve announced $2.7 million for a few of them working with the Correspondence School. Some of my critics will be saying, “Hey! That’s not very much money!” But I say to them, “It’s more than they were getting last month so shut up, man.”

Another thing I’m really excited about is the brand-new Education Council of Aotearoa New Zealand. This excellent body will independently oversee the registration of teachers in New Zealand. Previously the Teachers’ Council were a body made up of representatives elected by teachers.

After several minutes of exhaustive research the Ministry of Education, under the watchful eye of Moi, we decided this “elected” make up was not independent enough. We have decided to independently appoint all members of the new council independently. Our appointment meetings will be independently held in my office with independent officials all independently bringing their own rubber stamps to approve my independent appointments independently.

The most exciting thing about this new body is that some teachers won’t even have to be registered. That’s right! Unregistered teachers. But only if you’re working in a partnership school. Teachers who work in the state system will still have to be registered by the council because they are far more likely to become “bad eggs” than people who’ve never worked as teachers in their lives.

Remember: if you don’t want to be registered, for whatever reasons (all of which will remain outside the Official Information Act), and you want to be near children, THEN COME ON OVER AND WORK IN A PARTNERSHIP SCHOOL!!!

We’ve got some more awesome ideas to be announced in the budget – many of which will sound awesome when they are originally announced but, on closer inspection will be even more awesomer than you could ever imagine!

Excited? I know I am.

Sweet. As.

Enjoy the rest of your week.

Hek x

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